submitted by Nashe Mutenda today is the first day
the one month we are given a year
where we are allowed
to an extent
and though i love celebrating
it feels strange to celebrate
when we are so far from what we can appropriately define as
so today instead of celebrating
and succumbing to your beliefs that we are
today i am going to talk about my body
and through that show you why i still cannot celebrate
jump with joy
and pretend that this is some happy-go-lucky
month long cultural festival.
my body has been generously blessed by the sun.
but it has been cursed by the eyes
that refuse to acknowledge the power in her rays.
cursed so much so, that one year ago today
my body was reduced to an object.
like a doll
but i treated my dolls with respect
i had tea parties with them
but no one year ago today,
the eyes that cursed me
cursed my body
successfully transformed it into an object
like how i handle my cushions when i am
except there is this minor, perhaps trivial difference
my cushion has no soul.
but i guess the eyes that cursed me
also cursed the soul out of me.
so it worked.
i was an object
and the eyes that cursed me got what it wanted
and for a while i hated the sun
i fucking hated the sun
i fucking hated her power
i fucking hated her blessing
i tried to curse it
but how do you curse the powers
that made you.
there are many bodies like mine
who have been generously blessed by the sun
and yet have been viciously cursed by the eyes
who refuse to acknowledge her power.
these bodies have been and are still
tirelessly fighting these curses.
so we thank you
for the one month a year
that we can pretend that there exists
no such thing as a
but we ask that you understand
why we struggle to celebrate.
Featured Image by Boya Sun
This piece was submitted to The Collective–a space for students outside of the Black Praxis staff to share their thoughts, opinions, and perspectives. The views expressed in this piece do not necessarily reflect those of Black Praxis and its staff. To submit something of your own, e-mail email@example.com.